Inappropriate customer

[Scuba-74]

Highlighted his age originally because there is a power dynamic inherent in very large age gap situations. A younger person harassing is not "more appropriate" but an older person harassing *additionally* engages the power older people often have over younger people. Then you have an age gap power dynamic in addition to the gender power dynamic.

Highlighted the second time because someone said "older is subjective" and I clarified because older is subjective and I meant "much older than me" - which you would have read but decided to take it out of context anyhow. But you just seem intent on arguing a moot point to... I don't know, is it to derail? No idea what your purposes are with this but it isn't helpful or respectful. Picking apart small use of language when the topic is much more serious and broad is weird

Got it, thanks for clarifying. Didn't mean to be disrespectful, just genuinely didn't see what age had to do with anything. You and one other poster before you answered my question. Sorry this happened to you, hopefully it was an isolated incident that won't repeat itself in the future.

 

[pelan-pelan]

Been there. Very difficult to provide evidence. Definitely nothing in private - stay public. What about asking to change trainee/swop with another instructor. Maybe another female who might then corroborate your experiences. Or maybe swop with the senior instructor - either tell them what is happening, or simply say you think the trainee would learn better with them. Or ask if the senior instructor has observed anything. This is not running away - this takes the courage to hold your feelings in and to solve the situation without conflict or danger to yourself. You are the one who you must protect.

If anyone asks why the change over, ask them if they can think of a reason and that response would include if the trainee asks the question.

I hope you can escape safely. Formulate your tactics for when it happens again. Because, in my experience it will - but perhaps you can prevent it.

Does your dive op hold regular staff breifing/training? Then ask them, hypothetically, what any instructor/divemaster of either sex should do if they are being "accidentally" (not) touched up. There could be useful discussion. This way to actually do something to improve/clarify procedures.

Stay safe - you are not alone. Don't let this worthless perv leave a scar on your life.

 

[lowwall]

Been there. Very difficult to provide evidence. Definitely nothing in private - stay public. What about asking to change trainee/swop with another instructor. Maybe another female who might then corroborate your experiences. Or maybe swop with the senior instructor - either tell them what is happening, or simply say you think the trainee would learn better with them. Or ask if the senior instructor has observed anything. This is not running away - this takes the courage to hold your feelings in and to solve the situation without conflict or danger to yourself. You are the one who you must protect.

If anyone asks why the change over, ask them if they can think of a reason and that response would include if the trainee asks the question.

I hope you can escape safely. Formulate your tactics for when it happens again. Because, in my experience it will - but perhaps you can prevent it.

Does your dive op hold regular staff breifing/training? Then ask them, hypothetically, what any instructor/divemaster of either sex should do if they are being "accidentally" (not) touched up. There could be useful discussion. This way to actually do something to improve/clarify procedures.

Stay safe - you are not alone. Don't let this worthless perv leave a scar on your life.

I'm the manager of a small law firm with only 6 employees. If you find yourself in a similar situation, please tell your employer. Don't hide or try to leave hints about the situation, tell them outright. If you are uncomfortable telling your immediate boss, find someone else you can talk to. The employer needs to know so they can take appropriate action and so they can protect your fellow employees.

If they blow your off or worse, you know it's time to escalate the issues to someone higher up. If that doesn't work, you know it's time to start looking for another employer. And always document what you've done in case the employer retaliates. You will likely have a legitimate employment law claim.