"I refuse to dive with him!"

[tiburon72157]

typical noob on the defensive. unfortunately, you just don't get the big picture. never said i was a perfect diver. just inherited above average skills. and no i never made the typical noob blunders...probably due to the fact i have good awareness and comfort level in the water. good luck with your future diving experiences...

 

[Darnold9999]

My 2 cents.

I will dive with anyone once, don't mind diving with new divers, hoovers, whatever and will pretty much follow any dive plan I deem safe. I have come up with half a tank left while my buddy is at the end of his/hers. I have come up dry when my buddy's tank is half full. Means nothing, some use more air than others. New divers tend to be at the hoover end of the spectrum, but not all. Some big guys go through air just as fast no matter what their experience level.

However, I may not dive with you again if you put me or yourself in danger AND you don't care.

We have all done stupid things, the part I can't deal with is those who won't learn from the mistake. All of the "horror stories" I am reading seem to fall into this category. The missing piece is the "AND you don't care". e.g. if I were to signal that it was time to head up as I was getting low on air and you decided to ignore me and that it would be OK to take few more pictures you just put me in danger. We would have a discussion on the boat. If I figured out that you didn't care vs there was some confusion re signals planning etc. then we wouldn't be diving again. If it was confusion then we deal with the confusion and I am good to go.

The grey area is somebody that is just incompatible. For example, I pretty much have a hands off policy when I dive. Not always, but almost all of the time. Drives me crazy to be with someone that has to poke everything with their knife or finger or whatever. I may not want to dive again with such a person. Have not yet had to do that, but I could see a certain personality/attitude that would be incompatible over a weekend or week. I am just as certain that there are people out there who would find my personality hard to deal with. I suspect that even in such a situation the common ground of just being able to go diving would overshadow most incompatibilities.

Don't know - what do you think????

 

[grazie42]

I dive with instabuddies once in a while. I used to do it often but I´ve found that dives I don´t have to consider solo, despite a buddy, are a lot more fun.

I´ve had a few bad instabuddies, some of them were "dms" (by certification at least). When I think about how I dived when I was new to the sport I´m amazed that people took the time and were patient enough to dive with me. Diving with new divers is a bit like "paying it forward" though I´ve had a bunch of dives with new divers that were made better by their enthusiasm and "newbiness".

I also think that good communication on the surface about everything pertaining to the dive is a requirement for a good dive with an instabuddy (or any buddy, really). If you fail in your responsibilities there, don´t blame the buddy. You cannot assume that everyone´s SOP is that you surface together or stay at a certain depth etc, you have to agree to do so before getting in the water. If you don´t then you pretty much get what you deserve...IMO...

 

[redrover]

Nice range of attitudes for this low experienced diver looking for and finding plenty to learn. Thought I’d toss in a couple of pennies.

If you don’t dive with any body you’ve not dove with, how did you ever get into the water the first time?
Sure, you can establish some point at which you now no longer dive with people you don’t know and feel comfortable with. If it satisfies your needs to be diving, that’s cool. But how did you get to that point?

From getting close to a year of extensive reading here I’m getting the drift of; it would be good for us new divers to get a mentor, find a good buddy and dive more often than not. For example, any body reading the new posts in general recently probably knows of TS&M having found such a thing. It appears to be the cats pj’s for rapidly learning to dive enjoyably and I suspect, to be a joy to dive with. I’d love a mentor and a good buddy that wanted to dive when I was able to. Unfortunately the YMMV thing holds truer than I realized when I first figured out what the letters stood for, not all of us have that opportunity.

I also get the impression there is a considerable amount of divers that live in relatively non-diving locations. Hence there are a large number of occasional dive trippers, and on a dive trip experienced divers, meeting up and dealing with clashing desires and limitations. Heck I live in a destination dive place and dive with more people unknown to me than the same group of buddies.

I can fully understand the threat or actual experience of bad pairings are of concern. As low on the dive count I am, I’ve had ‘em too and half were with more experienced divers. No, not bad to the point I thought I was gonna die, they just weren’t very enjoyable dives. And I’ve been solely responsible for not having an enjoyable dive but in the process, learning what does make for me an enjoyable dive. Often the problem was accepting a more experienced diver’s advice on how something should be. Things like where to place the tank or how much weight is right or what they mean by fun. I’ve also got tips and suggestions that made enormous improvement in my diving experience. I’m pretty sure I’ve ruined someone’s dive by hooving, but motoring at mach 9 and not being able to stop an look at things I see was not what I was in the water for either. It appears to me one person is in general, different than the next.

Months ago when I was still dry behind the ears and reading threads discussing this I was asking myself; how am I going to gain more experience?
I can wait and wait and wait for someone that is willing, when I have more experience. I can pay for boat dives that have a DM group thing going on and at least broaden my site, condition and how other divers do things experience. I can find a place I’m really comfortable with from years of snorkeling and wing it solo learning from my own mistakes.
I’ve read enough that none of these things are recommended, well some less arduously than others but that is what I’ve done, flame away at will.

 

[vkalia]

typical noob on the defensive.

Actually, mate, I had exactly the same reaction as well... I chose not to post it, but it isnt just a "typical noob on the defensive" reaction.

Vandit

 

[Skeeter1097]

You all are scaring me! I think that I might just stay at home intell I have a 101 dives. NOooo. I think not, I have only 30 dives and love to dive. At first I had a hard time finding divers that would take me along. But that did not last long. Every weekend I have divers ask me to dive with them. I just wish that I had a wife that dove so as I could dive more often. But I see your point about the air thang. I am a large man and althow I pratice air control at 60', 70' looking for lobsters, 30 to 35 min. Just drifting on a reef been peasfule. Have made 53min. I just need bigger tanks. But if any of you would like to dive West palm Beach, Fl. Drop me a line and I might let you supper divers join in. LOL

 

[Bottom Scratcher]

typically i won't dive with anyone not equal to, or higher than my experience level. my regular dive buddies are rescue up to instructor level divers. i don't like babysitting ow, aow, or similar classification divers, with fewer than say 50 dives. it has completely ruined my day in the past, when i have done so. and i don't want my enjoyment of the sport in general to be compromised. hence, the reason why i haven't pursued dm certification. when i spend my hard-earned bucks on boat trips, i want to get my money's worth, doing what i want to do, when i want to do it, and where i want to do it. i have enough trouble dealing with newbies stumbling and bumbling and always under foot on the surface, let alone underwater on life support equipment. just not my thing. saving/rescuing somebody however, is a different story. i have dove off of several boats here locally, and most of the captains and dm's know me and don't hassle me when i choose to go over the side solo. i'm comfortable with it, and so are they. not any different if i were a photographer, and dove solo which many do. many times, none of my dive buddies have been able to join me on boat trips, and as such, if i didn't go diving on my own, i'd be left staring at the walls. i simply won't let other people's schedules, commitments and flakiness dicate my opportunities as to when i am able enjoy my interests. the same goes for road trips on one of my bikes. i always tell people that know me, that the only way i won't come back to the boat is if something ate me. and if that is the case, a single dive buddy, more than likely isn't going to help the situation much. since neither one of can outswim whatever animal it was, and considering i would probably be already dead from loss of blood/drowning, etc. anyway, its somewhat of a mute point. sounds rather morbid, but its true. wrecks, overhead environments and some drift diving, are an exception...a dive buddy in those situations is a must. i have been in and around the ocean since early childhood swimming, surfing, snorkeling and eventually diving. i love and respect the ocean and it's inhabitants very much, but i do not fear it/them.

You should dive with rescue divers only. You are going to need one one day.

 

[ReefGuy]

Actually, just a typical response to your attitude.

I was fortunate enough to get an instabuddy (kinda) for my first trip. The week after certification, I went to Key Largo on my own, but met up with someone my dive shop knew was also down there for the weekend. This buddy took me, as noob as they come, and worked with me all weekend, teaching me the ins and outs of boat diving, diving etiquite, and giving me tips you only learn from experience. He even skipped his dives on the Spiegel Grove and Duane to dive the limitations of my OW cert and didnt complain once. Probably the best dive trip I've taken yet, and one of the reasons I gained confidence as quickly as I did.

I try to maintain the same attitude as Ron did. I like diving with new divers. Not only do I look as a way to "pay it forward", but it also keeps MY enthusiasm up. I love it when a noob finds their first nice sharks' tooth, or meets their first jewfish up close and personal, or gets a close look at a mantis shrimp, or seahorse, etc.

typical noob on the defensive

 

[Eeyore48104]

As a "noob", I hope I can live up to the expectations. I have only had a couple of dives other than in quarries, so I'm still practicing (buouyancy, breathing). I'll have my first opportunity to be an "insta-buddy" next month in FL.
Like several of you, I have found my solution to being older and larger (even though in shape) - larger tanks.
But, if people only dive with others of equal or greater experience and others had the same attitude, none of us would do much diving! I thank the gods for the more experienced folks who are willing to share with me - not only experience but experiences!

 

[CD_in_Chitown]

You all are scaring me! I think that I might just stay at home intell I have a 101 dives. NOooo. I think not, I have only 30 dives and love to dive. At first I had a hard time finding divers that would take me along. But that did not last long. Every weekend I have divers ask me to dive with them.

You obviously have no reason to be worried. The budding divers that know what they don't know are a pleasure to dive with. Its the guys who saw how this SCUBA thing works on James Bond, or some such, that don't seem to realize that if you buddy with someone you should take that responsibility seriously.

While I agree with Belushi that there are signs above water to identify who might have trouble with the planned dive, I would posit that the really reckless ones are not going to be as easy to spot as the really nervous ones, at least IMLE.