Follow-up on dating an diving

[chiara]

OK, I read through all the messages in the "Women only" thread, but I've seen nowhere mention of what happens if your SO turns out to be your last certifying instructor.

Here is the story: when my instructor told me he was ready to send out the papers for my Dive Master he also went a bit further on: he asked me what I thought about transforming our instructor/student relationship in a possibly life relationship.

The papers are out, he is OWSI so if I want to go on and do my IDC it won't be him, he's my dive buddy, he's 41, I'm 36.

I was still trying to figure out how such a thing could possibly happen to me when I received an e-mail in return from my announcement that I had successfully completed DM from the instructor who certified me for Nitrox...

Guess what?

"Now that we are colleagues, what about coming a bit closer?"

Yeah, right, but he lives in Egypt:whoa:

And I live in Belgium, that makes give or take 5.000 Kms!

When I was doing my nitrox course with him last year, there were totally unjustified rumours about us because we used to spend a quiet moment on the sundeck of the boat during lunchtime, sometimes talking, sometimes just reading a book, nothing else, and anyway we didn't close doors it was done in front of everyone else.

Of course both of us were aware of the gossiping and just laughed at it.

And now he comes out saying: I wish I had been less shy and given a good reason for those rumors...

I'm not ready to quit my job for Egypt, nor am I sure that my conscience (catholic upbringing and regular churchgoer) would allow me to think about having something serious with a divorced man (the instructor for my DM who in fact lives about an hour away from here).

And anyway, I prefer the guy in Sharm el Sheikh

 

[Ladydiver]

Chiara,

Boy oh boy! You need to talk to Scubababy. She's engaged to her instructor.

Seems to be in the air these days.

 

[ScubaBaby]

chiara

reading your story had me in stitches !! Especially about the fact he's in Egypt!

I met my fiancee in egypt. He was my instructor out there and did my Advance O/W....then my medic....then my rescue - not that I was trying to have excuses to be around him

Anyway, if you feel like having a gossip and what we share in common - feel free to email me or PM me.

And just a word of advice...if he likes you so much...get him to move to you - thats what I did!!

And as for the religious thing - if you believe in god etc....don't you think he'd want you to be happy (get in there!!!)

 

[Rick Murchison]

Interesting.
I'd never given it much thought before, but now that y'all mention it, the store owner where I teach is married to a former student of his, and the instructor who's my regular buddy is married to a former student of his... and the training director is married to one of *his* former students. Three out of five.
Rick

 

[SpyderTek]

Goodness! I think there must be something in the water out in Egypt or soemthing!

Booking a flight IMMEDIATELY!

SpyderTek

 

[Vinga]

Sounds like the guys really like you!
You should take some time considering differences in religion and family. Meet their families, if you can, very enlightening. You do marry all of them, not just the man.
Also, basic habits: similar styles of eating, playing, working, and, groan, handling money. Scuba instructors are all poverty cases, he won't be able to "provide" for you, or children, should you have them.
Marriage is too big a commitment to just jump into without knowing your partner pretty well. And why do you want to marry? What do you see for yourself in twenty years? Yikes!
Good luck!
Melissa

 

[voln]

Chiara,

You should see the thread where folks have been bemoaning how hard it is to find an SO who also dives - looks like you have two potentials, so count yourself lucky!

I guess the objection to a professional relationship turning personal is that the instructor may want to give preferential treatment to the SO/ instructee, like professors and their students - but I don't think that applies to diving since he is all the more motivated to make sure you know your stuff otherwise you could get in trouble UW, so he's not going to cut you any slack! In any event as you pointed out divorced guy is not going to instruct you further - what about Egypt guy?

So.. go for it!

V.

 

[chiara]

Vinga,

fortunately enough, Egypt guy is not Egyptian, he only works there!

I certainly see your point, but he is German and I hope he'll decide to come back to Europe, as he mentioned this more than once.

 

[Vinga]

Yup, guess I sound like I'm waggling my finger at you.
To be taking your training so far, you must be a real water-lover, and two instructors can work on quality boats anywhere on Earth.
Good luck, and keep in touch!
Melissa

 

[tchil01]

Originally posted by Rick Murchison
Interesting.
I'd never given it much thought before, but now that y'all mention it, the store owner where I teach is married to a former student of his, and the instructor who's my regular buddy is married to a former student of his... and the training director is married to one of *his* former students. Three out of five.
Rick

So does this mean that I would have a better chance at meeting Ms Right if I was an instructor???? OK, where did I put those course sign up sheets???