Diving with Spouse/SO – Benefits/Issues?

[El Orans]

Since we do mostly shore diving all our gear is assembled out of the back of the car.

Besides, have you ever seen an underwater argument between husband and wife....it can be quite amusing! not that i know from experience or anything

We've had an interesting argument below that continued on the surface. It ended with our firm conviction that a buddy-line is inherently evil and that it should not be used to replace buddy skills...

 

[drl]

I dive almost exclusively with my husband. We trained together (though they wouldn't let us be buddies in class). We each have dived with other buddies on occasion, but not often. I for one am leery of insta-buddies, though I'm happy to dive with someone else that I know.
Certainly I know I can trust him to look out for me and vice versa. We still always do buddy checks (somewhat abbreviated, since we know each other's gear). We each set up our own gear, and share the schlepping. In fact, when he had back trouble the doctor said he could dive but not carry gear on the surface, so I had to schlep both our gear.
There's a lot to be said for having a permanent buddy that you can trust and know what to expect of. There probably are some dependency issues--I usually rely on him for navigation, since I am "directionally challenged" even on land, but I often do most of the dive planning. No reason not to go with your strengths.
My guess is that diving with an so pretty much mirrors the relationship in other ways. If you work well together topside you will probably dive well together. If there are control or dependency issues in the relationship they will not improve underwater. We've had occasional issues but never anything that would compromise safety. I have seen some scary couples out there, though, and spouses doing things that no one would tolerate in an insta-buddy.

Deborah

 

[fishdelasol]

So far, I have only gone diving with my husband. We both set up our own gear, but we do our checks with each other to make sure we didn't miss anything. He is a nice guy and helps me get my BC in just the right spot on my tank (I hate it when it hits the back of my head). He also hauls the tanks around.

I had often wondered about the issue of diving with others after diving with the same person all the time. While I love having our own system that works and really knowing my buddy, I still want to make sure I am a good buddy all around...not just with my hubby. I ended up doing a search on what makes a good buddy and I think I'm doing all right.

Great thread!

 

[diverdowndh]

I am VERY fortunate - I met my fiance' in Puerto Vallarta about 6 years ago (had to go to Mexico to find her, only to find out she lived about 20minutes from me) and we not only live together, but dive at least 1-2 trips a year. This past year, we went to Belize in March, Cozumel in June, and Fiji in October. We have another Coz trip coming up in February, which will mean 4 dive trips in a calendar year.
She does all of her own setup, I use to dote over her and a couple of DM/Instructor friends noticed this and recommended, for both of our sakes, that I stop. We agreed to this quite a few trips ago and other than the usual last minute checks before a dive, we usually check our own. We are both Rescue certified, I am working on my DM so we are both capable divers.
On my recent Fiji trip, I helped a diver to the surface (had a little problem and I helped him to the surface) and he and I took a dive after he got situated. It was really cool to dive with another person. He had lots of experience, which made it easy, but it was really cool to dive with someone else. It made the next dive with my gorgeous fiance' that much better.

 

[Parysa]

I don't depend on my b/f for much as far as setting up gear. He sometimes helps me with tanks...ok...usually helps me with tanks. And I occasionally get him to double check me (more than just a once-over) to make sure I've done everything right if I feel like I've missed something. But I set up and take down my own gear. He does usually "lead" the dives, but not b/c I can't. He just likes to roam and we haven't gone anywhere yet that I've had any particular route in mind, so I just follow him. Besides, he's always the one who gets to see the neat stuff.

 

[Cacia]

I like diving with JB the best. (of course, because anything I do is fine, never any arguments, not a single one) But diving with others makes me a better diver so I try and do that regularly so that I hopefully stretch, think and improve a bit. It does require a big gear change mentally. (going from solo with air station to trying to be a good buddy)

Marines as buddies really grows on you. They never blame anybody else, no matter what happens and they generally navigate pretty well. A buddy that can navigate is priceless. Even the new diver ones seem to have good compass skills, I really appreciate anyone who brings that to the table.

I wish JB wanted to take pictures, I guess I just assumed that he would when I gave him my old D-100 set up. He sure doesn't see too excited. I would hate to have to follow me around on a dive, doing nothing. He is a stellar gauge checker.

 

[Dave Zimmerly]

I really enjoy diving with my girlfriend Evelyn. We have been taking two dive vacations a year since 2002, and the comfort we enjoy with each other is great. We both have our tasks and work together well as buddies. She has gotten her air consumption pretty close to mine so bottom time isn't a problem. Despite her small size, she can lug her own tanks and equipment, although I tend to do more of he heavy lifting. Over the years, we also have developed our own dive signals.

All in all, I think its great that we can both share in a activity we both love to do.

Dave (aka "Squirt")

 

[MXGratefulDiver]

My wife and I used to dive together all the time. Occasionally the post-dive debriefs would get ... interesting ... and her trip reports sometimes didn't come out at all how I remembered the dive. But it was always entertaining.

Four years ago we got divorced. We still dive together ... even go on dive vacations together ... and now we're better buddies than we ever were before ...

... Bob (Grateful Diver)

 

[Coll]

I had suggested that my gf get involved in ScubaBoard to widen her knowledge make friends etc etc but after all these posts of bf's and husbands hauling tanks for their ladies, I'm not so sure!

 

[Damselfish]

I dive mostly with my husband, but once in awhile we dive with other people. We take care of our own stuff, or trade off, or whatever works at the moment. Definitely neither of us is dependant on the other. I do tend to take care of more gear cleanup and little things, while he is messing with his camera. Fair trade for the great pics.