You read my mind. Was waiting to hear back from the OP about exact location before formulating theories but I was thinking about both of those.It sounds like your friend is describing the location of the mastoid process.
DDM can certianly shed more light on this theory - but apparently mastoid cells with poor pneumatization can cause ear barotrauma.
“Risk factors for MEBt include poor ET function and poor mastoid pneumatization“
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6147252/“
Perhaps as the depths get great enough the added pressure causes pain in the mastoid process as a referred pain from the ear itself?
Best regards,
DDM