Chasing Dragons with Plastic Swords

[PerroneFord]

I would just like to give a hearty thanks to the supportive group of folks here. Without your constant feedback and support, Im not sure I would have done what I did tonight. Many of us have some irrational fears in our lives. Whether it be death, heights, depth, or what have you. Mine was simple. It was having water in my eyes. No, seriously.

As a kid I enjoyed the pool tremendously. Lots of fun times, and great summers. One day as a young boy, I went to the pool and like I had done many times before, I opened my eyes underwater. Unfortunately, some lunatic had shocked the pool with about 4x the normal amount of chlorine. My eyes burned for hours. It was a terribly traumatic experience. Some years later, my mom needed to put eyedrops in my eyes. I tried to overcome my fears and do it. They burned like hell, reminded me of my former trauma. Needless to say, this was NOT helpful when it came time some 15 years later for my open water class. I fumbled through and somehow managed to do well enough to pass. That was 11 years ago. And this fear has been sitting there since then.

I knew that in order to dive again, I'd have to get beyond this. But like the person who has a fear of heights, summoning up the courage to walk to that ledge and look over, takes a lot of moxy. So tonight, after my pool practice session, I just decided to do it. In 4 feet of water, I flooded my mask, and "panic". I stood out of the water, disgusted. Took of my mask and cursed myself and my fears. I still had my regulator in my mouth. I decided to just give it another go. I put my face back in the water with my eyes closed and just focused on my breathing. After a minute or so of calm, slow breathing, I slowly opened my eyes. It didn't burn, and it didn't hurt, but it was strange. If you can imagine, it was actual task loading as I tried to fight my fear and breathe without my mask. I closed my eyes to calm myself. Then I opened them again, and took a look around the pool. I slowly sat down and just looked around and took slow breaths. I had slayed the dragon. I had my eyes open, mask off, and was breathing calmly. For 11 years that moment had eluded me...

I will get in the pool again Wednesday and try a slow swim without the mask. Slowly build up my confidence. But this was a very very good day. My buoyancy was decent, my frog kick is coming along, but I put my tank too low again which is a PITA. Couldn't do my valve drill.

Anyway, thank you to all the DIR faithful for sharing your stories of personal triumph. They were inspirational in helping me reach this day. This hurdle I had to jump before getting into open water again.

 

[Spoon]

good luck to you and congratulations on slaying that dragon. its always hard to overcome our worst fears and inner demons, im still struggling with a few but im glad you got yours out in the open and faced it.

 

[headhunter]

It's great to hear about your triumph over an obstacle that stood in your way.

I believe that we can turn our greatest fears into our greatest assets by working though them. It's all about focus and determination.

Congratulations.

Christian

 

[lord1234]

perrone, just a heads up...there is NO requirement to have your eyes open during a mask drill. In fact most people I have seen do mask drills, I see do it with their eyes closed.

 

[Uncle Pug]

While it is wonderful that you've overcome your fear... not only is there no requirement to open your eyes during a mask drill... keeping your eyes closed and using your other senses helps in buoyancy control.

In fact that is something you can practice even with your mask on.

 

[PerroneFord]

Thanks for the heads up guys. One thing. The idea of this is not so much "DIRF" skills. It's about overcoming fear under the water. If I back down from this, what's the next challenge I walk away from? Being in an overhead? Buddy seperation, panic in a silt-out?

I read an interesting story about a mask-loss incident involving Sheck Exley. The diver was able to swim out of a cave because Exley would move ahead on the line, and the diver would swim toward the light. I thought to myself, if I was that poor SOB without the mask, I would have died in that cave. And all because my panzie butt won't open my eyes underwater. So I wanted to dispatch the fear.

Maybe I'm just nuts that way, but to me it's mind over matter. And after 11 years, I said enough is enough. Time to move on.

 

[Doc Intrepid]

I don't know much about the rest of it, Perrone, but no-mask swimming helps tremendously to build confidence. You can still see well enough, given decent vis, to follow a line with no mask on. You can locate your buddy, discern some hand signals, (obviously) see light signals, and follow a deco schedule with your buddy, all with no mask on. And someday you may have to. When I was taking my cave course one of the drills was following a line on the bottom with no mask, for quite a ways, perhaps a 20 min path. My instructor didn't mention until afterwards that this was a 'washout drill' - iow, if the student couldn't do this comfortably, the intructor would not teach the student until they could. The fact that I could see both the bottom and the line without a mask on but with my eyes open made keeping my bouyancy and trim much easier...and I could follow the line effortlessly. So do what you have to do in pools, but practice no-mask drills with your eyes open in the ocean. The day may come when being able to perform well without a mask will come in handy.

 

[Meng_Tze]

I agree Doc,

If you can see something, even if it is vaguely, your brain wants to use your eyes and will base most activity on sight. No matter how bad it is.

When you get to the 'lights out and lets go home' drill in the cave..... then it makes sense to close your eyes, sense becomes much more astute then. But as long as there is light, try to use your senses at their maximum.

 

[do it easy]

i'm glad you're getting through this. currently, i'm afraid that if my mask comes off, i'll get an instant brain freeze and pass out. i'm planning on working on this at the end of the ice dives this winter.

 

[PerroneFord]

Thanks guys. I have much less fear about getting in the pool next time and trying to work my way around the pool without my mask.

I know this may sound stupid, but does the speed you're swimming make any appreciable effect on your eyes and how they feel? Meaning, is it like wind, where the faster you go, the more inclination you have to close your eyes?