Bali early Oct - Menjangan, Penida, or Gilis? or...?

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Tulamben has wonderful diving. The only downside, especially for your wife, is the shore entry. It can be very difficult.
That's why the resort called Scuba Seraya or the one next door called Villa Markisa are better than staying anywhere at the village. There is a sandy beach which takes all the difficulty out of the shore entry. To go to the wreck or any other dive site where the entry would be over stones, from those resorts you take a boat instead.

I've just completed four days in Lembongan and enjoyed it thoroughly. ... I used World-Diving in Lembongan and cannot say enough good things about that company -- very safety-conscious (like, one DM per 3-4 divers) and fairly comfortable boats.
Were John and Sue there? They are fine folks!

If there's anything to do on Lembongan other than dive or lay on the beach, I'm not sure what it is.
Well, you can go visit a pearl farm, but the draw of Lembongan is really diving and surfing (in season) rather than "culture." Some resorts have swimming pools and other resorty facilities. If I'm not mistaken, you can use Hai Tide Huts' "beach club" (with water activities like banana boat and kayaks) for a daily fee.
 
yes agree with valwood the shore entry at Tulamben is a pain. Also you should know Tulamben is quite remote, there are not many shops or massage joints etc. When I was new to diving and unfamiliar with Bali I stayed at Tulamben for a few days to dive and almost went crazy, there is nothing to do in the evening after you have finished your diving.

Now I usually stay at Kuta or seminyak and do daily transfers. This way you can also have access to a wider variety of sites from your "home base". For example, you can do N. Penisa on Day 1 and Tulamben on Day 2 and Amed on Day 3 etc. Menjangan is too far though.

Although some may think it's crazy to travel 2.5h each way to Tulamben or Amed, I think it's a good trade-off for the luxury of chic restaurants and good spas in the evening/night, which is what you would want on a honeymoon. Also more choice of nice and reasonably-priced villas (especially in october) in the seminyak area, as compared to Tulamben.

Hope this helps and doesn't add to your confusion! PM me if you need more help, I go to Bali at least 4 times a year. Cheers.
 
Lembongan when i was there late august last year 'shutdown' very early. We were travellers only there for a few days but struggled to find anywhere to serve food after 9pm, and most of the bars (only a few of them) stopped serving around 9.30-10pm. Not sure if was related to ramadan which was a few days later? There are a few nice little secluded bays but i would say outside of diving/snorkelling there is little to do other than beingn on the beach or pearl farm.
 
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