Whether the webbing harness will wear your exposure suit will depend greatly upon the type of webbing used. There are many different types of webbing used from fairly rigid (useful as it has a "memory" - less fiddling when donning the rig) to soft (generally preferred for crotch straps). As I only have experience with my BP/Wing setup, I can't comment on the different webbing types offered by the various manufacturers.
I also had the same concern you have regarding ease of removing the rig. This is a non-issue. The only time it becomes an issue is if you have some condition that limits the mobility of your shoulder joint(s) (sport injury...). From the first time I used my rig, I have not had a problem donning and doffing the rig. It really is quick and easy. The easiest method for me is to "chicken wing" out of the rig, i.e. pop the harness off my shoulder using the D-ring for grip, then folding my lower arm up onto my upper arm, then slipping my arm under the harness (note that I have read better descriptions of this process than what I have just typed!).
As to the need for a chest strap, it is also not an issue (IMO). The way the harness runs through the BP tends to hold the straps in the correct position. As long as the harness is correctly sized (not too sloppy), the harness stays in position.
My advice is that you purchase your setup with a "Hog" harness (straight webbing). If, once you have dived with it a few times, you still have problems with donning and doffing the rig, then consider purchasing a "comfort" or "deluxe" harness. That way you should have not wasted money on a deluxe rig that you most likely do not really need. I have read more than enough posts here from people that have purchased deluxe rigs and wanted to return to the conventional system soon after trying out their systems for the first time.
I think that most issues with the conventional harness can be solved through correct sizing and practice.
Cheers,
Andrew