A little fable about an undersea chain

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Roughwaterjohn

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Location
San Diego, California
# of dives
500 - 999
One of the members of a local San Diego dive list asked, innocently I'm sure, if there was a story behind a sunken chain off of La Jolla Shores. Never one to pass up an opportunity to cut myself on my rapier wit, I dashed this off and sent it. I hope you are able to find comfort in this story. ;)

John A.

A story, why yes there is.............. (key in the sound of harps strumming)


.......... so there we were, motoring out of Mission Bay, our 8' motor yacht glistening in all it's aluminum glory, the Evinrude purring like the proverbial kitten, my Yacht Club cap jauntily askew on my head. Me an' the crew, 15 of the ablest sailors ever to come outa Hugh's Playboy mansion, were set'n sail fur the high seas. Miss December 2003 and April 2004 were breaking the sea spray with their ample, ummm prows, whilst I checked on our cargo o' Cap'n Morgans. So's, there we were, mind'n our own bidness, don't ya know, when outa da blue, dis here big ol boat jus jumped outa nowhere and rammed us. Seein's how it was apparently unoccupied and anchored wid this huge 'ol chain, it came as quite a surprise to me an'a crew.

Well, since I'd been sampl'n our cargo since somtime yesterday afta'noon, I was prepared for da worst. Holy Sh*t I yelled, save da booze, but no one waz pay'n no 'tension to me see, cuz dey waz bunny ears 'n cottin tails flying ever which way! Well, I grabbed that there big 'ol chain, and damn&d if id did'n just rip off'n that old boat and landed plumb inna middle 'o my yacht!

Well, inna drink I went, me an'a my crew anyways, and we was bound fur Davey Jones locker quiker'n you can say 'how much fur 20 minutes?' Well, I was hold'n onna that chain, cuz it was wrapped 'round me precious cargo, and I was trying to swim to my crew, Miss September especially, 'cuz she be 'specially bouyant fur sum reason.

Anyways, der I was , hanging on to me cargo for dear life, when outa the deep, comes this big 'ol giant grouper wear'n a pair 'o bunny ears and a mean streak jus glaring from his eyes. I was so fright'nd, I done plumb dropped that chain and poor 'ol Cap'n Morgans ta boot. I tried ta save it, but dat mean 'ol Grouper, he jus kept chas'n me all 'round the wreckage. He finally gave up when I started strip'n the excess apparel from my crew and toss'n it at em. So, there i was, clinging to my crew.......


I'm sorry officer, what was the question?
 

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