How would you deal with this ?

[Frosty]

You're doing a boat dive in a group of 6 divers.
You are just AAW certified and youve done about 30 dives total.
8 with your DM/Instructor in the past few days at the same dive site.
The dive group is DM,You and two couples -in each couple one has done a fair few dives as an OW diver,the other is a freshly minted OW diver.
The dive plan is for the DM to lead followed by the two couples with you as tail end charlie. You'll follow a basic square pattern to end up 35-40 minutes later back under the boat.
Within minutes of getting to the bottom one new diver ends up taking a fair bit of the DM's attention with minor issues. meanwhile The experienced partner in the other pair heads off in their own direction. loosing sight of their dive buddy.
The new diver starts looking a littly uncomfortable being aways behind "everyone else" (not aware you are tailing the group)
Maybee I was being a bit over protective but I "buddied up" with the new diver untill we caught up and the group tightened up again 10 minutes later. Then dropped back to TEC.
I don't think the actual dive buddy was even aware there was an issue.

So -whats the polite/correct thing to do in this situation?
Was I just being an old grandma and shoulda left well enough alone?

 

[TheCanuck]

Naw I think you did good. It probably reassured her which must have lowered her levels of fear. You never know what a new diver might do if he/she has their mind elsewhere worrying about stuff.

 

[GFuterfas]

I have been in the 'new diver's' position before, and am still grateful to the nice experienced diver who helped me when I was uncomfortable.

Buddy awareness skills are so important, and I've found many divers allow way too much distance between them and their buddy. I was guilty of this until my AOW instructor made me write out 25 times... 'I will stay close to my buddy'.

 

[TMHeimer]

I think you did well. On my very first boat dive (70+ feet) my buddy, the instructor's husband and very experienced diver, decided to zig zag when I wasn't looking in order to lobster hunt. It was uneasy being at 70+ feet alone, though I was confident all would be fine. Nevertheless, it was reassuring when I shortly met up with 2 other divers.

 

[Frosty]

Made a bit of a joke about it afterwards saying I'd "stolen" the wandering divers girlfreind off him and we had such a romantic time down there holding hands. Not sure if he got the message but I noticed on the second dive he made sure he was a lot closer to his gal.

 

[Bubbletrubble]

So -whats the polite/correct thing to do in this situation?
Was I just being an old grandma and shoulda left well enough alone?

You asked what I would do in this particular situation.
During the pre-dive briefing, I would have told the DM that I didn't have the training/experience/equipment/comfort-level to dive solo.
(That's essentially what you were doing before buddying up with the inexperienced diver.)

The DM would have buddied me up with one of the existing buddy pairs, making a 3-person team.
If the experienced diver in my team wandered off and my buddy and I didn't know where he went, we would have followed our "lost buddy protocol" agreed upon during our pre-dive planning. In the post-dive debrief, we would discuss how we could prevent "lost buddy" situations in the future.

If I were solo-diving and functioning as a rear-guard DM in the scenario you described, then I would have approached the inexperienced diver, asked her "Where's your buddy?", and then we would have gone through the "lost buddy" protocol. If possible, I would have notified the lead DM of the missing diver. Continuing the dive without following "lost buddy" procedures puts the experienced diver at risk of getting into trouble (since he's all alone). 10 minutes is plenty of time for something bad to happen.

 

[Bedros A]

I think you did well to buddy up with the uncomfortable diver. OTOH I think the wandering diver deserves to be slapped hard

BA

 

[TSandM]

In the instant, I think you did the right thing. Having been a new diver whose buddy went wherever he wanted, I know how anxiety-inducing that is. On the other hand, if that new diver had been me, I would not have relaxed when you came, because I would have continued to look for MY buddy . . . as I ought, and as I was taught.

Basically, the way the dive was set up, you accepted being put in a position of both solo diving and acting as a DM, and for neither role do you have the experience or the training. That was pretty unfair of the DM on the dive, I think. In addition, it impacted your enjoyment of the dive, because you were placed where you felt you had to take charge of a situation that was created by another diver's irresponsibility.

So, I stand with Bubbletrubble -- I would have joined the abandoned diver, calmed him or her, signaled the DM, and executed lost buddy protocol. And then I would have had a quiet but not very happy conversation with the missing buddy, about how my dive AND his partner's got ruined by how he behaved.

 

[currier]

The new diver starts looking a littly uncomfortable being aways behind "everyone else" (not aware you are tailing the group)
Maybee I was being a bit over protective but I "buddied up" with the new diver untill we caught up and the group tightened up again 10 minutes later.

Bubbletrubble and TSandM have hit the nail on the head - "buddying-up" with the uncomfortable (stranded) diver, signalling to the DM, and commencing a buddy search is the 'right thing to do' - but I'd never have even considered the latter steps, to be frank ...

I would have done just as you did, Kazbanz ... I would have sidled right on up to that neglected inexperienced diver and remained just where you did -

And THIS is the difference between us novice divers and the more experienced ...

BTW, I got a real kick out of your approach to the wayward (experienced ?!?) buddy afterward!

 

[Jim Lapenta]

I would also have told the DM that they need to pay more attention to the group they are leading for no other reason than pace. A new diver struggling to keep up is a sign that the DM needs, if they are following him, to slow down. The DM with new divers in the water should not be setting the pace. The slowest diver should. But I'd say you did good and like the way you handled boyfriend. He deserved that one big time. Of course maybe he was trained in the "buddy procedures" many seem to be. Talked about or mentioned in class then completely disregarded in the pool and on checkouts.