You'll die if...

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You will die if you don't get your damn hands off my boobs right this second!
 
You will die if you eat taco bell before a dive and don't release the pressure before ascent......
Okay, pop quiz.

Does farting make you more or less buoyant? Think about it . . .

-Bryan
 
you'll die if you try reading the first 7 pages while eating spaghetti!!
 
Youll die if you wear a dry-suit - "Those things are dangerous!"
Youll die if you wear a wetsuit - "Hypothermia!"
Youll die if you wear no exposure suit at all -"HYPOTHERMIA!"
Youll die if you wear a STAB jacket - "Those things put you on your front"
Youll die if you wear a wing - "THOSE THINGS PUT YOU ON YOUR FRONT!!!!"
Youll die if you wear a horse collar - "Those things are old and will kill you"
Youll die if you use an aqualung - "The aqualung is way to dangerous compared to the yves le prieur brething aperatus"
 
You MAY die if you pee in your wetsuit...
You MAY die if you pee in my wetsuit...

But YOU WILL DIE if you manage to pee in my wetsuit from the other side of the room...
However I will be impressed.
 
if all of the above are too dangerous for you, in front of the computer is just the place for you
 

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