How did you convince YOUR spouse to start diving

[nelsonrl]

In my case it only took about 15 years. We tried snorkling several times and she never really enjoyed it. Could not convince her that I thought (I did not dive either) that diving would be much different.

So just before a vacation 3 or 4 years ago, we were in a dive shop getting new masks for another attempt at snorkeling. The shop owner walked by asked why we did not dive and my wife said - one I don't swim like a fish and two, I am afraid of sharks. So the owner explained the likely hood of a diver becoming lunch for a shark vs a snorkler and that in diving is more about a relaxed stroll through the reef that a swim meet. Two weeks later we were in our cert classes.

BTW, on our second dive we came within 5 feet of two reef sharks. Now my wife is disappointed when we DON"T see sharks on a dive!

Bottom line, I did not push or convince her to dive, she came to the decision on her own. Congratulations on 24 years with your wife. We are coming up on 32.

 

[terrylowe]

As a wife that was 'pestered' unmercifully for a few years because the hubby wanted to learn I'd say don't give up! There may be hope yet!

We were both snorkelers and happy doing so until we saw some divers underwater in Grand Cayman. The hubby got it into his head that we needed to try it. I said no. I thought it would be too hard, I thought we were too old, I thought he was crazy ... and so on. I loved water but just didn't think I was up to diving. The subject came up frequently. I got off the hook that summer as he broke a rib playing baseball. Damn thing healed! Every time we saw a dive shop it would come up (and there are quite a few in Austin!) One day while getting my daughter soccer gear, he popped into the LDS next door. Came back to drag me over there to just look. (Yeah, right!) Finally I gave in and said that I would consider it if he could - #1 - get us a female instructor, and - #2 - shut up about it till class started. Didn't slow him down at all, and I was signed up about 30 minutes later. Smart man kept very quiet till class started. As feared, the class was 3 guys and me - but at least I had a female instructor. I still wasn't thrilled but did great at the classwork. The epiphany happened the first pool day. All it took was sitting at the bottom of an 8 ft pool breathing with a tank & regulator in the pouring rain and I was hooked!! It was total Zen for me. 8 years & 352 dives later and I've ended up being a much bigger addict than he is! Since then, we've taken lots of classes together, and lots of dive trips. After shipping the daughter off to college, it really gave us something to share - even if it was just diving in the local mucky lake together.

Find out what is stopping her .... and see if they're things that can be resolved. Is she really, truly not interested? Or maybe she has reservations like I did about being able to do it. If she has any interest at all, let her pick her instructor and do things her way. Who knows! Maybe she'll give in like I did and get hooked!!

Kat,
I will meekly and humbly leave a copy of this message on her sewing table.....

 

[scarefaceDM]

My better half does not swim very well. She is afraid of deep water(almost drowned as a child)...so in a pool I had my dive gear checking things out. She was looking at me looking at her...I had a fullface on and she asked me.."do you breathe through your mouth or your nose"...I said both. "really" she said, yes I said...next thing you know she asked if she can try it on. So I slipped the fullface on her explaing to her what to do. I had her put her face in the water only. ( keep in mind the rig is still on me and I am holding her as she places her face in) Next thing ya know she takes off and starts to swim head in water ..as I am following her along 4 feet of water just keeping my hands under her hips...we were going around in circles...she was only under as far as the hose on the fullface went. I grabbed my mask and took the alternated and sat down and watched her breath under water at 4 feet on her knees and giving me the ok...we stayed under for 20 minutes..just breathing and playing paddy cakes....lol

She does not dive to this day..but she enjoyed the fact of not being restricted in her breathing. She asks me from time to time about that day and how it would be nice to get a fullface and try it again....My reaction was one of surprise and told her the next time we go south I will borrow a fullface so you can have a go at it in warmer waters to see the perty fishies....She agreed. But to depths not more than 5-8 feet....

Bottom line is,,you never know...just let things go and she may turn around and like to try.

 

[JTH2711]

I am in the same boat. My wife refuses to swim in water that she can't see her feet, and under no circumstances will she put her head under the water particularly salt water. She has recently said that the Discover Scuba class sounds interesting but the idea of Jaws coming out of the deep reaches of the quarry scares the crap out of her. In short to answer your question, stop, she will come around if she wants to and if not i'm sorry.

 

[Louie]

terrylowe,

If she's spent so many years watching you from the surface and hasn't grown interested, then chances are, diving is not an activity for her and she will never develop an interest.

We all have a tendency to become absorbed with something we love and fail to realise that others may not share our interest and passions. I live near a ski mecca and so many have asked me how I could possibly not be into skiing - to which I reply: "I hate snow, the cold and it looks like an absolutely ridiculous waste of money."

You may think she's missing out on the great splendours beneath but to an unenthusiastic and uninterested diver, there are no great attractions beneath.

Are there other activities that you BOTH enjoy together? Save the time, money and arguments by discovering a new pastime. It might be the best thing for the both of you.

Should I Learn to Scuba Dive Because My Partner Likes It?

 

[tkdgodess]

Leave her alone. I've been diving for 17 years, been married for 13 years. DH has ZERO interest in diving. Unless she actually comes out and says "I'm ready to try" forget it. If my kids ask when they are old enough, that would be great, but if it's not for them OK. I like my dive time. DH is an excellent swimmer, and will happily snorkel for hours. I am happy to swim and snorkel with him, and I have diving.

There is nothing worse that teaching a spouse that is only learning because "my husband wants me to" Nightmare.

I just read above about a spouse who nearly drowned as a child. I nearly did. My Dad's bosses son nearly drown me. I was 7, I remember it clear as day, I was pissed. Once I got him off me he was afraid to go back in his pool.

My mom who had never got her own hair wet in her own pool in 20 years, asked me to bring scuba gear over to try. She enjoyed herself to get a proper mask/fin/snorkel, and now gets her hair wet swimming, that's good enough for me. Some folks are not divers.

 

[scubadada]

I learned to dive in SoCal at age 15 and dived for about 10 years before a life demand hiatus. I was recertified when my son turned 12. My wife and daughter watched us enjoy diving for about 4 years. When my daughter turned 12 she convinced my wife to get certified with her.

Since then, I've done all I can to make sure my wife has had a good experience. She has nearly 100 dives now and we have a blast diving together. We're going to Curacao for the 1st week of November. Her favorite spot to dive so far in Bonaire.

Good luck, Craig

 

[terrylowe]

These are GREAT stories! Love reading them. Lots of difference between people.

She told me last night that she might be interested in learning "ballroom dancing". :banana: Huh? I don't have a coordinated bone in my body!
I think she is backing me into a corner! LOL!

 

[Chill Diver]

I have been interested in trying scuba for about 10 years. My wife didn't want to do it. She had a very strong prescription (glasses) so when we went snorkelling, she couldn't see anything. No wonder she wasn't interested in taking it a bit deeper.

Fast forward 10 years and a Lasik procedure. We are doing a south pacific cruise for our 10th anniversary and there are diving excursions at every port. SHE actually suggests we might want to try it out.

I wasted no time in lining up our OW certs. We finish our open water dives in a week and half. We had a very good instructor who listened to my wife's concerns (what if I freak out underwater etc.)

She actually got 100% on her final exam and had no problems in the pool sessions. We now plan to get some gear, do the drysuit, AOW, night diver, and rescue courses.

Funny how a cruise can be such good motivation! Better 10 years late than never

 

[pjhansman]

I'm one of the lucky ones....my wife is a water person. We started off snorkelling in Maui, and when I got hooked on the idea of diving, she required no convincing. Having a great instructor for our OW cert was the clincher. Now she's as addicted as I am.